This seems like yesterday. It felt like it took FOREVER for her to grow into that 0-3 month onesie that said Mommy's Little Cupcake. Don't let those chubby little arms fool you- at 4 months, she was lost in it.
For such a long time Kasia was so baby-like. It was like having a newborn for a really long time. At one, we still couldn't use the tray on her highchair because it came up to her shoulders!
Her baby stage was more like 2 years, not one. In some ways, I secretly cherish it. After all, how many people wish their sweet little babies would never grow up?
Three years old went by in a blur! All I recall is that we really seemed to be getting somewhere! At 3, she finally hit the elusive 20 pound mark and we said goodbye to the crib!
At four years old she's still sweet and lovable. Still tiny enough to carry around and cuddle on my lap. And eventhough she started school this month, she still often seems so small and so fragile.
But then something strange happened. Bangs happened! With a snip of the scissors, she turned into a big girl! The pictures aren't great (pictures with toilets in them usually aren't), but it's the best I could do.
Which brings me to the Growth Hormone.....
At the request of our geneticst, Kasia recently had bloodtest to check the level of growth hormone her body is producing. What I thought would be a fairly standard test was actually 3.5 hours of a needle being stuck into Kasia's arm every 30 minutes. It was awful. It was another one of those moments that will not get me into the running for Mother of the Year. With every needle, I kept asking myself, "Why are you letting them do this to her? Why???"
Growth hormone is certainly controversial and comes with a great deal of scary side effects. The problem is, if you're truly deficient in growth hormone, there are a number of consequences aside from small stature. So what's a mother to do?
We're still waiting for the results, which I'm desperately hoping are normal - that way I won't need to make that difficult decision.
If it's normal, then Kasia is small and that's all.
"Even the smallest person can change the course of the future."
~J.R.R. Tolkien
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5 comments:
Fingers crossed for normal!!!!
I find her tiny-ness delightful!
I wandered over from Ellen's blog. My son is also 4, and just recently made it back on the charts...he too is small, but it is because of malnutrition for the first two years of his life. He has some food allergies that effect his GI tract so he wasn't absorbing. We had the growth hormone testing done, they wanted to do what your poor daughter went through but I made them recheck the single stick test (if that makes any sense) because the first one only came back on the low end of normal. Thankfully the second test came back normal. I can't imagine you or your daughters agony during that testing! It was my worst fear! I hope all comes out well!
Thanks Katy... I find everything about the little scamp delightful!
Sarah.... single stick test?? Ugh...why don't I know about these things??
I have to agree wholeheartedly with Kasia's delightfullness (a word?). I love the pictures and the bangs are too much! It's amazing how much older she looks.
OMG - she is adorable. My older boys were at the top of the growth curve (while languishing at the bottom of the developmental curve). Now I'm thrilled that the 2.5-year-old is still to small for 24 mo. pants!
Hope that test comes back fine.
And don't beat yourself up - we do everything we can. When it comes to medicine, we simply cannot put ourselves between our children and the beast. I DO know how you feel here. I have to hold Reilly down as they sedate him for each MRI. I hate it.
love.
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